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Waking Consciousness


No one and no-thing can refute our experiences. As this year of 2021 comes to a close, it is so validating to hear the similarities and differences people are experiencing in these very strange times where the civility compass spins out of control. While truth stands alone, the world around us wants to sully and obliterate any personal connection to it. As many have observed, this happens through shaming, tyrannical mandates and separation from others; but ultimately we have become fractured in ourselves with cognitive dissonance. To borrow a Sedona astrologer Joseph Anthony's phrase: "We are spiritual beings having a human experience." I once read, "F.E.A.R. = False Expectations Appearing Real."

I can confirm clinically and personally that there are definite patterns as to how sickness morphs. So many people are learning to be directed by the compass of their hearts to come face to face with their unconscious contracts in their souls. Our "junk" DNA appears to be "turning on" and our light bodies flipping the switch to brightness from the darkness that has weighed heavily. Where free will is involved, there is no stopping the momentum of inevitable change. In my throws of recent illness, I felt I was literally trying to find neutral despite being tossed through a storm. Every suture in my skull ached and burned with a cough that rattled and racked the entire power strip of my body. I could not stand up long enough to make a cup of tea or to feed myself and I am so grateful for those who simply dropped soup off for me at the door.

Dualistic mental gymnastics are Herculean and competitively linear. Wandering the wilderness of my mind, I tried to see the shape of the demons I was wrestling with until I realized that I needed to surrender to be here now with the suffering. There was so much dreamy conversation that I did not know where it came from. At the same time, I tried not to skip ahead to see how my story might end. As the nastiness unfolded, I realized I could no longer label or blame factors outside myself. Through the delirium I observed what was no longer working for me in my life. The retreat of being prostrate for nearly three weeks gave me ultimate strength to make clear cut, positive decisions for me. The upshot is, I feel like I got a sort of energetic upgrade that released my resistance to see things as they are not as I would want or wish them to be. Hence, I am acutely reminded of Lao Tzu's wisdom: "Give evil nothing to oppose and it will disappear by itself."

It is the last full moon of the year as we slide toward the cold and longest night of the Winter Solstice. Though flames of light may spark on the wind, re-member who you are and what is important moment to moment. As we enter 2022, may the awakening of our spirits and the compasses of our hearts help breathe us into the presence of co-creative free will and love~

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